On the last day of 2009, I am reflecting at the year and decade previous. I got married, had a family, started a career, dealt with personal and professional problems, and raised children. I could go on about some great philosophical idea that I have learned, but I will settle for this simple list.
Things I learned in the last decade
1. Faith is a muscle. It needs to be stretched in order to grow.
2. I would never trade youth for experience.
3. Being a parent is about trying to do the right thing everyday.
4. Remember everyday your not a good parent tomorrow is another chance to try again.
5. God meets you where you are not in the "Church."
6. God works miracles even in the modern age you just have to expect them.
7. Random events are not random at all just God's plan.
8. Money is not important.
9. Family is important.
10. Live for today. Tomorrow is gone. The future is uncertain. Live today for God's glory by loving God and loving your neighbors.
Happy New Year.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Water Witching the Soul
Water witching whether you believe in it or not (Personally, I think it may have to do more with some people's empathetic abilities with the natural forces than with actual witch craft.) is the most basic skill of any living creature. Finding a source of water. In the soul, I am referring to the well of eternal water which Jesus said would bubble up inside a believer.
The new church which my wife and I now attend has begun an interesting journey to finding my soul water. My recent post about my dream didn't bring forth any great dream interpretation, but it did help my to understand the meaning of my dream. God sent me the dream in order to help my understand that while I am wandering I am not lost all. The things I need are right there in my general neighborhood.
At our old church, I was spoon feed the Word of the Lord. The muscle that I like to call faith was atrophied to a small unattractive spec. But now with the new church spiritual living is not spoon feed at all. I tell my wife all the time this church is about relationship, and relationships take time. I have also come to the realization that this church is about seeking your own spiritual food not being spoon feed the Gospel. I have begun the slow but ever present search for God in my daily life. When not being feed I need to find it on my own. I am witching my soul trying to find the well that I know is just below the surface. I know I can find it, but I also know that it will come at a price. As someone in the new church said, "Relationships get messy." So does digging for a well. Breaking through the surface means coming into contact with pieces of me I wanted to bury. So, here's to digging a well and here's to finding out what God wants to show me about myself.
The new church which my wife and I now attend has begun an interesting journey to finding my soul water. My recent post about my dream didn't bring forth any great dream interpretation, but it did help my to understand the meaning of my dream. God sent me the dream in order to help my understand that while I am wandering I am not lost all. The things I need are right there in my general neighborhood.
At our old church, I was spoon feed the Word of the Lord. The muscle that I like to call faith was atrophied to a small unattractive spec. But now with the new church spiritual living is not spoon feed at all. I tell my wife all the time this church is about relationship, and relationships take time. I have also come to the realization that this church is about seeking your own spiritual food not being spoon feed the Gospel. I have begun the slow but ever present search for God in my daily life. When not being feed I need to find it on my own. I am witching my soul trying to find the well that I know is just below the surface. I know I can find it, but I also know that it will come at a price. As someone in the new church said, "Relationships get messy." So does digging for a well. Breaking through the surface means coming into contact with pieces of me I wanted to bury. So, here's to digging a well and here's to finding out what God wants to show me about myself.
Sunday, October 04, 2009
Dream
I just had a dream last night that had some significant spiritual tones to it. I know part of what the dream meant but now I am in need of an interpretation of what to do next. My wife suggests that I should put out there that I am looking for someone to help me interpret but not give away the story of the dream. Much like the story of Joseph I am seeking someone who could tell me what my dreams was and then tell me what it means. It is kind of scary living out something I have only read about in the Bible but the dream was that kind of dream. I really want someone to tell me what it all means. Has God giving you a message meant for me?
Thursday, October 01, 2009
Neglecting the fundementals
My wife and I have been on a spiritual journey of late. We started at a new church over the summer time. The church is based off a home church model that meets as a larger community every other week. I really like the model of the church since it has challenged me to really get into relationship with those in my church group. The problem as I can see it right now is that even though the church challenges me it is not like the fundamental church that I grew up attending. My wife has really struggled with the part time nature of the church and the community. I keep telling her that it is all about relationship. I know this is true since my cousin is a regular of the same church. The model only works if we really work at making our Sundays about the relationship with the group and with the community at large. But like anything in life it takes a lot of work to make this church work for our family.
But is my wife, right? As the spiritual leader of my household is this experiment with church not good for my family? I have been feeling that I am not growing closer to God just forgetting Him. But would a normal church help me with that?
But is my wife, right? As the spiritual leader of my household is this experiment with church not good for my family? I have been feeling that I am not growing closer to God just forgetting Him. But would a normal church help me with that?
Friday, July 10, 2009
Great Falls
Sunday, June 07, 2009
I love the smell of paint in the morning
This week I was only able to complete one of the scheduled. On 06/04/09, I completed the four mile run scheduled. I ran the whole route in forty-one minutes and fifty-six seconds that is a pretty good pace for me. I was not able to complete the earlier run because of the rain and the fact that I switched to a night schedule at work. You can view the route of the race below.
View Runs in a larger map
On Saturday 06/06/09, I went paintballing with some friends from work. I had a really good day. My gun performed well, and I was able to hunt down some players without any trouble. I know that I was supposed to run that day, but I think that running up and down the ridges in the Pike national forest counts. I certainly felt like I had run a great distance after finishing my day paintballing. We played in the Rampart Range area below.
View Rampart Range Paintball in a larger map
View Runs in a larger map
On Saturday 06/06/09, I went paintballing with some friends from work. I had a really good day. My gun performed well, and I was able to hunt down some players without any trouble. I know that I was supposed to run that day, but I think that running up and down the ridges in the Pike national forest counts. I certainly felt like I had run a great distance after finishing my day paintballing. We played in the Rampart Range area below.
View Rampart Range Paintball in a larger map
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Week Runs in Review
I decided that I am going to blog at the end of the week each week to chronicle how my training for the Denver Marathon is going. I already completed a three mile run on Thursday 05/28/09. I was not real happy with the run since my right shin was giving me trouble. You can read more on the previous blog entry.
Today, I completed a six mile run in one hour and about twenty-one minutes. I started out on my normal route down Prince to the Platte River trail. On Saturdays and Sundays the trail is busy. I thought that it would be light traffic because I started the run at about a quarter to ten a.m. The trail was packed. I was glad that I only ran the trail south to where the Lee Gluch trail meets the Platte River trail.
I took the Lee Gluch trail east for the majority of the run. It is such a beuatiful trail. I was happy to have most of the trail to myself. I did have some trouble with my shoes being to tight but I got through it. I completed the run with only a few walk breaks. I figure at this point it is okay to walk a few minutes when you are just getting into shape again.
If you want to see the route I took you can view it below it is the red route. Thanks for reading my Blog please contribute to my Second Wind Fund raising located to the right of this entry.
View Runs in a larger map
Today, I completed a six mile run in one hour and about twenty-one minutes. I started out on my normal route down Prince to the Platte River trail. On Saturdays and Sundays the trail is busy. I thought that it would be light traffic because I started the run at about a quarter to ten a.m. The trail was packed. I was glad that I only ran the trail south to where the Lee Gluch trail meets the Platte River trail.
I took the Lee Gluch trail east for the majority of the run. It is such a beuatiful trail. I was happy to have most of the trail to myself. I did have some trouble with my shoes being to tight but I got through it. I completed the run with only a few walk breaks. I figure at this point it is okay to walk a few minutes when you are just getting into shape again.
If you want to see the route I took you can view it below it is the red route. Thanks for reading my Blog please contribute to my Second Wind Fund raising located to the right of this entry.
View Runs in a larger map
Thursday, May 28, 2009
On the Run
So, I should have been more up to date on my life recently but I am doing this when I have time. I am training to run the Denver Marathon 2009 with the Second Wind Fund team. I have to raise $2500.00 before the race. I also will be training over the coming weeks. This will be the first marathon I have run. I did run the Georgetown Half Marathon in 2007, but never a full 26 miles.
Today was a run day for me. I had to do at least three miles. I run a loop North on South Prince Street from West Caley Place, west along the pedestrian path along the creek to the Platte River trail, and then north again to Santa Fe and South Prince Street where I take Prince south to home. I don't know the exact mileage but it is roughly a three mile loop. Bad news is that I could not run the whole loop. I kept getting cramps in my right calf. I have had this complaint before so I expect that it will go away soon. I have made a link of the run here.
Please visit my fund raising site here or just look to the right of this blog entire to contribute to Second Wind Fund.
Today was a run day for me. I had to do at least three miles. I run a loop North on South Prince Street from West Caley Place, west along the pedestrian path along the creek to the Platte River trail, and then north again to Santa Fe and South Prince Street where I take Prince south to home. I don't know the exact mileage but it is roughly a three mile loop. Bad news is that I could not run the whole loop. I kept getting cramps in my right calf. I have had this complaint before so I expect that it will go away soon. I have made a link of the run here.
Please visit my fund raising site here or just look to the right of this blog entire to contribute to Second Wind Fund.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Disconnected from the Web
(Disclaimer: I understand the irony of posting a blog entire about being disconnected from the web on the web. If I wrote this down with pen and paper no one but myself would ever read it. So there.)
I had the pleasure last week of being disconnected for the web. All be it I didn't really have a choice since we forgot to pay the phone bill. Being disconnected brought me back to the reality that for many years I never knew about email, Facebooking, or blogs. Yes, I know that it may sound like the standard old guy rant. I am one of the generation who witnessed the birth and growth of the Internet. It has been an interesting experience. I can now communicate with people I barely know or don't know at all in countries around the world. I could never have seen this as such a crucial part of my world when I was in elementary school.
But is the Internet really as crucial to the world as we think it is? I have theorized with my wife that really as people we don't go beyond our own circle of real friends on the Internet. That is to say people don't always really make the same friendship connections with people across the world on the web that they do with people in their own local area. I am aware that there are individuals right now who would argue with me that they have friends in many different countries. Maybe their right they do find those friendships. But I am speaking in terms of the people as a whole.
How many times have you joined a group of some kind on the web only to be shunned or ignored by the existing members? Many times even though we are interested in the same thing doesn't mean that we will accept people we are not familiar with. We are more often comfortable with those familiar to us. People get exclude others on the Internet just like they do in real life.
I have strayed from my original thought. Once I was forced not get on to the Web. I found that I felt relieved of some kind of burden. It seemed like life got quieter. The Web adds noise to life just like a television or a radio. You don't realize that until it is gone. The hard part now that I got back on the Web is finding a way to leave it turned off more often than turned on. Unlike the television which is easy to turn on and off. The Web has become a constant stream pumped into our lives. It is hard to shut it down. The Web has entangled it self into most facets of life. I need to learn self control to turn away from the Web and focus more on the real part of life. It figures that I would have to keep learning self control even at thirty.
I had the pleasure last week of being disconnected for the web. All be it I didn't really have a choice since we forgot to pay the phone bill. Being disconnected brought me back to the reality that for many years I never knew about email, Facebooking, or blogs. Yes, I know that it may sound like the standard old guy rant. I am one of the generation who witnessed the birth and growth of the Internet. It has been an interesting experience. I can now communicate with people I barely know or don't know at all in countries around the world. I could never have seen this as such a crucial part of my world when I was in elementary school.
But is the Internet really as crucial to the world as we think it is? I have theorized with my wife that really as people we don't go beyond our own circle of real friends on the Internet. That is to say people don't always really make the same friendship connections with people across the world on the web that they do with people in their own local area. I am aware that there are individuals right now who would argue with me that they have friends in many different countries. Maybe their right they do find those friendships. But I am speaking in terms of the people as a whole.
How many times have you joined a group of some kind on the web only to be shunned or ignored by the existing members? Many times even though we are interested in the same thing doesn't mean that we will accept people we are not familiar with. We are more often comfortable with those familiar to us. People get exclude others on the Internet just like they do in real life.
I have strayed from my original thought. Once I was forced not get on to the Web. I found that I felt relieved of some kind of burden. It seemed like life got quieter. The Web adds noise to life just like a television or a radio. You don't realize that until it is gone. The hard part now that I got back on the Web is finding a way to leave it turned off more often than turned on. Unlike the television which is easy to turn on and off. The Web has become a constant stream pumped into our lives. It is hard to shut it down. The Web has entangled it self into most facets of life. I need to learn self control to turn away from the Web and focus more on the real part of life. It figures that I would have to keep learning self control even at thirty.
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Loving something too much
It is said over and over again that you must seek the career in the field that you love with all your heart. After having come into my current field in law enforcement, I have to say that statement is true. I love what I do, and I love being at work most of the time. Now I have to tell you that I don't like being at work all the time nor do I like what I do a hundred percent of the year. When I compare it with other jobs that I have had over my life I really enjoy law enforcement.
Here is the crux of this entry. Loving your job too much. Can it lead to wanting it more than your own family. Admit it. Most of the time your job is more clearly defined and has defined goals. Family life is messy and does not always have clearly defined goals. At work you have to do certain things everyday and have yearly even monthly goals that can be measured and rewarded. Family life has certain regular routines but often these can be repeated until you are ready to scream without real reward. As far as goals, I challenge anyone to tell me what's the goal of a family. I am not saying that I would trade in my family or that one family is better than another but what is the plan or the goal. Is it getting all the kids through school? Fiscal solvency? Or what is it?
The point is that work has something we might call stability, and family can be a crazy ride that doesn't really end. What is more important? The rewards at work or the rewards at home. In the end, what everyone (looking for that perfect good that defines your life) must understand that you can fall in love with something too much. A job that is perfect for you can define you, but can drive you away from what really matters and that is your family. Jobs may come and they will go, but it goes without saying that no one wishes they had spent more time at the office at the end of life.
Here is the crux of this entry. Loving your job too much. Can it lead to wanting it more than your own family. Admit it. Most of the time your job is more clearly defined and has defined goals. Family life is messy and does not always have clearly defined goals. At work you have to do certain things everyday and have yearly even monthly goals that can be measured and rewarded. Family life has certain regular routines but often these can be repeated until you are ready to scream without real reward. As far as goals, I challenge anyone to tell me what's the goal of a family. I am not saying that I would trade in my family or that one family is better than another but what is the plan or the goal. Is it getting all the kids through school? Fiscal solvency? Or what is it?
The point is that work has something we might call stability, and family can be a crazy ride that doesn't really end. What is more important? The rewards at work or the rewards at home. In the end, what everyone (looking for that perfect good that defines your life) must understand that you can fall in love with something too much. A job that is perfect for you can define you, but can drive you away from what really matters and that is your family. Jobs may come and they will go, but it goes without saying that no one wishes they had spent more time at the office at the end of life.
Sunday, April 05, 2009
So the world has not come to an end yet
It has been a while since I have written an entry. Life is continuing on a pace. I have been out on the road for almost three months on my own. I just completed a whole week working as a regular district car. I was nervous about working with other deputies that I have not worked with before. If anything freaks me out more that screwing up is screwing up so that it puts my fellow deputy in harms way. I know that some might say that I shouldn't be so paranoid about the danger on the streets of Littleton, CO. I say if we don't stay vigilant we will fall prey to danger.
My son is going in for surgery tomorrow. My parents, my wife, and I all prayed over my son this evening. It feels good to have faith that allows me to bring before God something so simple but so scary. I don't know if I fully appreciate the danger my son faces even in this routine surgery. I think it is a combination of pure ignorance of the danger and reliance on God.
My son is going in for surgery tomorrow. My parents, my wife, and I all prayed over my son this evening. It feels good to have faith that allows me to bring before God something so simple but so scary. I don't know if I fully appreciate the danger my son faces even in this routine surgery. I think it is a combination of pure ignorance of the danger and reliance on God.
Monday, February 09, 2009
It ain't easy to be in public eye
I have to give an up date on where I am now that Patrol FTI is over. I am assigned to a local highschool down in the south end of the county. I have already had my own sex related case, and I probably could have done a lot better job on it. I interviewed the suspect wrong, probably charged to high, and I didn't book him through when I could have. Not that anyone is busting my chops about this case. I have been more down on myself than anything else. The hardest part of being on patrol for me is being in the public eye. How much easier it seemed when I was in the jail or the courthouse. Admittedly, the courthouse was more public than the jail but it seemed more cozy and familiar. I also have to admit that in the courthouse I had more experience going into the job. I was working the courthouse at least every other month. Patrol I a little expierence with but not as much going into it. Time will give me more confidence though. I know that I have a lot to learn.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
16 things
My wife did her own sixteen things that people would want to know about her. She encouraged me to do my own list. Since, I didn't do her other hundred things to do be for I die for purely morbid reasons. I think that I can do this list without any trouble. It is after all a new year, and I have been telling my wife that I want to live with more purpose this year.
1. I am quiet and thoughtful. I may not say a lot to the people around me, but don't take that as a sign that I don't care.
2. I am friendly to just about everyone, but there are very few people I consider true friends. I know that I am not the best person at letting my true friends know that I think their special to me, band for that I am sorry.
3. I love my job as a law enforcement officer, but I know that I cannot save the world. I can only hope to touch a few lives along the way.
4. I love my children each in the own special way. It is hard as a father of four to find time for each of them but I love them all even when they are not listening.
5. I take politics seriously, but I don't think that anyone change the world through government. Government is a reaction not a cure. It takes people acting with good in their heads, and God in their heart to change the world.
6. I worry about money but have no idea what I would do with it if had all money I needed. I cannot imagine life without sacrifice. God calls us to depend on him, and that cannot be done if we have all we need through money.
7. I have no pretense that I will die a good man, but not a famous man. I would rather that I have the love, respect, and devotion of my wife, children, and friends than fame.
8. I love to play. I know that I don't get out a lot to play my favorite sport paintball a lot. I wish there was more time in my schedule to do so. I also wish that there were a way to include my family so that it was not either or but we could all share in the enjoyment of my play.
This is the end of the list for now. I don't want it the be about everything that is on my mind right now in this second. I will come back on finish off on another day.
1. I am quiet and thoughtful. I may not say a lot to the people around me, but don't take that as a sign that I don't care.
2. I am friendly to just about everyone, but there are very few people I consider true friends. I know that I am not the best person at letting my true friends know that I think their special to me, band for that I am sorry.
3. I love my job as a law enforcement officer, but I know that I cannot save the world. I can only hope to touch a few lives along the way.
4. I love my children each in the own special way. It is hard as a father of four to find time for each of them but I love them all even when they are not listening.
5. I take politics seriously, but I don't think that anyone change the world through government. Government is a reaction not a cure. It takes people acting with good in their heads, and God in their heart to change the world.
6. I worry about money but have no idea what I would do with it if had all money I needed. I cannot imagine life without sacrifice. God calls us to depend on him, and that cannot be done if we have all we need through money.
7. I have no pretense that I will die a good man, but not a famous man. I would rather that I have the love, respect, and devotion of my wife, children, and friends than fame.
8. I love to play. I know that I don't get out a lot to play my favorite sport paintball a lot. I wish there was more time in my schedule to do so. I also wish that there were a way to include my family so that it was not either or but we could all share in the enjoyment of my play.
This is the end of the list for now. I don't want it the be about everything that is on my mind right now in this second. I will come back on finish off on another day.
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